Vegeta Swallowed a Fly? (Bad Title, I know)
by Earthbound Misfit
Summary: You know that nursery rhyme "The Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly" or whatever it's called? Well, this is a spoof of that with the Vegeta being the old lady. Want to know more? read the fic (and Review ^_~)


Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
Ch. 1: Vegeta Swallowed a Fly?!  
  
"There was a grumpy Saiya-jin who swallowed a fly, I don't know why he swallowed a fly, perhaps  
  
he'll die..."  
  
~  
  
"523... 524... 52- ACK! ::Cough! COUGH!::"  
  
Vegeta had been doing push-ups in the gravity room, when a fly had found its way into his mouth.  
  
Outraged, he stormed out of the gravity room and into the Capsule Corp. Just when he opened the  
  
door, he was knocked to the ground by Trunks and Goten who yelled, "Sorry, Dad!" and "Sorry!"  
  
over their shoulders. Vegeta mutters some swears under his breath, then enters his house. Once  
  
inside, he was welcomed by an unwelcomed shock (for him, at least...) Goku, Chi Chi, and Gohan  
  
were all over and happily talking to Bulma. Oh, hi Vegeta! I thought you were still training!"  
  
welcomed (I like this word!!) Goku.  
  
"Yes, until a fly went down my throat..."  
  
"HA! hahahahahahahahaha!! You stopped training because you swallowed a fly!?!" cried Goku,  
  
amused until Vegeta glared at him.  
  
"That is a small thing to make you stop training." observed Bulma. Just then, Goten and Trunks  
  
came in after hearing the news.  
  
"You swallowed a fly?!"  
  
"HEY! Maybe it'll be like that song, were you have to swallow all these monsters to eat the fly, or  
  
you'll die!!"  
  
"That's not how it goes! You have to swallow a spider to eat the fly, then a bird to catch the spider,  
  
then a a cat to eat the bird, and a dog to eat the cat-"  
  
explained Gohan, until he was interrupted by Chi Chi.  
  
"Dogs don't eat cats, they just chase them!"  
  
"The whole song goes,' There was an old lady who swallowed a fly-" started Bulma.  
  
"I refuse to be compared to an 'old lady'!" ranted Vegeta.  
  
"I'm simply stating the song, not comparing. Now as I was saying, 'There was an old lady who  
  
swallowed a fly, I don't know why she swallowed the fly, perhaps she'll die. There was an old lady  
  
who swallowed a spider, which swiggled, and giggled, and giggled inside her. She swallowed the  
  
spider to catch the fly, I don't know why she swallowed the fly, perhaps she'll die.-"  
  
"I don't think that's exactly right..." stated Trunks.  
  
"Yeah..." agreed Gohan.  
  
"Why would a spider giggle if it was just eaten??" asked Goten.  
  
"Ok, fine! It's not exactly how it goes, but the concept is the same!!!"  
  
"So, Vegeta, you're gonna die because of that?!" asked Goku.  
  
"I'm not going to die because I swallowed a little, weakling of an insect!!"  
  
"Are you sure you don't want to swallow a spider, just in case?" asked Trunks and Goten...  
  
~  
  
Ch.2: Vegeta swallowed a Spider?!  
  
"There was a grumpy Saiya-jin who swallowed a spider, who wiggled and jiggled and jiggled inside  
  
him. He swallowed the spider to catch the fly, I don't know why he swallowed a fly, perhaps he'll  
  
die...  
  
~  
  
"It wouldn't be a bad idea." stated Chi Chi.  
  
"You know, just incase..." agreed Bulma.  
  
"Alright! I'll eat the spider, just as long as you all shut up about it!"  
  
So, Vegeta ate the spider to catch the fly, little does he know that:  
  
"You know, now you're going to have to eat a bird." pointed out Gohan.  
  
"UGHHH... I'm not going to die because of a weakling-"  
  
"Just in case!!" cried Trunks and Goten.  
  
"You know how the story goes: I know an old lady who swallowed a bird. How absurd! She  
  
swallowed the bird! She swallowed the bird to catch the spider, who-" sang Bulma.  
  
"You don't need to keep repeating it. Besides, I got all I need from the song already."  
  
"Oh good! You're going to swallow the bird!" said Chi Chi.  
  
"No, it sates clearly in it: 'How absurd'."  
  
"They only used that word because it rhymed." said Gohan.  
  
"... Does it have to be alive?...." asked Goku.  
  
"Well how is it going to eat the spider if its dead, Dad."  
  
"hmmm... I guess a frozen chicken wouldn't work then. ha ha ha ha!  
  
" You baka, Kakarrot.... Fine. I'll eat the bird..."  
  
"Yay!" Goten and Trunks cried, while Chi Chi, Bulma, Goku and Gohan nodded their approval.  
  
~  
  
Ch.3: Vegeta Swallowed a Bird?!  
  
(I bet you couldn't have guessed that one! hahahaha!)  
  
"There was a grumpy Saiya-jin who swallowed a bird; how absurd! He swallowed a bird!"  
  
A/N: I know it's getting kinda repetitive, but don't worry, it'll speed up! have faith! And may the  
  
force be with you.... Always!  
  
~  
  
Vegeta ate the bird, actually, he was forced to swallow it whole so it would be able to catch the  
  
spider.  
  
"Next, you have to swallow a cat." said Gohan.  
  
"This should prove interesting!" exclaimed Goku.  
  
" yeah! ha ha hahahahaha!"  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"Be nice, Veggie-chan. And go on. Swallow the cat!" said Bulma.  
  
"Be sure not to kill it." warned Chi Chi.  
  
And with that, Vegeta swallowed the cat.  
  
"What' s next?"  
  
"A dog."  
  
" But dog's don't eat cats, do they?" asked Trunks.  
  
"Guess we'll find out. heh heh heh..." replied Gohan.  
  
Vegeta swallowed the dog whole, having little problems doing so, and them got ready for the next  
  
animal: a horse!  
  
"Horses don't eat dogs!"  
  
"Goth's right, you guys. Horses are herbivores, not carnivores." stated Gohan. Just then, they  
  
saw Tare Panda's face appear in the sky... they all looked up and listened to its wise teachings: "  
  
have faith in the ancient song. It will come through.... May the force be with you! -Oops Wrong  
  
fan fiction! My mistake. Everything else was true though. You know, about the ancient song being  
  
true and all.... Ok, I'm going to go now... Toddles!"  
  
" Don't you have the feeling that tare Panda visited us before?" asked Goku.  
  
"Yeah maybe it was in an earlier fan fiction Sailor M31 wrote?" suggested Chi Chi.  
  
"I wouldn't be surprised. She's a great writer!" exclaimed Gohan," and a great person, too-"  
  
"Ok, enough with the self advertising, already!" said Vegeta to the all powerful authoress.  
  
"Well maybe I just want to share my stories with the world! Maybe-" Started M31.  
  
" Can we get on with this story over with as soon as possible." said Piccolo.  
  
"Ok, fine. No more advertising....::sigh::" said M31, then to herself, "For this Fan Fiction, anyway.... BWE  
  
HEHEHEHEHE!! "  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"Oh nothing I just said 'for this- uh... I mean I said .... uhhhh..... ::ahem::"  
  
"Vegeta, you heard the panda! now swallow the horse!" said Bulma.  
  
So, Vegeta swallowed the horse and was now quite ::ahem:: large because of it.  
  
"Is that the end of the story??" asked Gohan.  
  
"I don't know, but I'm done with it so: YES! That IS the end of the story. Oi Gohan, you want to get Starbucks?"  
  
"always do!"  
  
One by one they all left the fan fiction, however Vegeta was too large to move so he waited there for someone to  
  
rescue him. Some say he was finally rescued by the tare Panda, others say he's still waiting, and still others say he took  
  
off the prop that made him look large and left with the others. I guess we'll never really know.  
  
"That was a stupid way of ending this stupid, and pointless fanfiction, baka."  
  
"You want to know what, Vegeta, I agree."  
  
"For once."  
  
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
"Wait, who said those last two lines??" asked M31....  
  
The End 


End file.
